Dating sucks…
To be completely transparent – I just want my person. To be assigned, arranged marriage, 90 day fiancé, married at first sight, and the pods .. oh Love is Blind and Perfect Match…
Like – why is it so hard … I know exactly why it’s hard … because it’s hard when you are a financially stable, smart, uncompromising girl who knows where she is going and is unapologetically me.
That’s why.
The more successful, the smarter, and the more financially stable – the more difficult it is to impress me.. my life is great .. my life is me and to be with me for the long – what are you bringing to the table?
Seriously?
So in Columbus, it’s hard .. I work.. a lot.. doing my job, instagram, renovations, family stuff, friend stuff and taking courses learning on the side – so it’s hard to meet people. When you meet someone, it is easy to fall into the trap
I like him.. he likes me.. it’s meant to be. HA! Not so fast…
Attraction, chemistry, commitment, and compatibility… 3 and 4 are the spots that sink the battleship… another day I will explain this but for now – there are the 4 things that decide if you will make it or break it…
So patterns …
The biggest Change in the last year is this…
1. How do you make me feel?
(When you don’t text or don’t call or say you will be at my house at 6 and show up an hour late or you stop by to drop off a flower, or come by after work to say hi, or you swing by to bring me ice cream)
I used to let the bad stuff slide – now, nope… you aren’t making me feel good – so I don’t pay attention to you.. because why should I? Low effort on your part = lower effort on mine.
2. Secure people don’t care that the person didn’t text back.. whatever …
When your friend messages back and forth and it takes them a few days to get back to you- you don’t spiral or ruminate on what you did or how you said it, however with a dating person.. you do.. so take the same approach- let the person message as they want and let them.
Do not disrupt your peace over a text or that the person saw your stories and didn’t call or message.
Low effort, no intention – answers everything
3. What do you want and what are you getting?
Are they the same or completely different? Don’t be afraid to walk away.
It is better to be single and on your own than in a relationship alone … the glass house is a real thing…
Don’t be anxious or worry about being on your – be worried about choosing the wrong person 🩷
Hope this helps!
Xoxo,
Heidi
